November 12, 2005

Alba Cross

From Sky Showbiz: Jessica's Sexy Maid Woes

In a recent interview with Zoo magazine (one of the most tit-filled, 'non-pornographic', weekly magazines in Britain, for those of you not familiar with it), movie star Jessica Alba complained about the nature of the parts she gets offered:

"The scripts I get are always for the whore, or the motorcycle chick in leather, or the horny maid."

Hey, genius! If you don't want to be typecast as a whore, stop agreeing to do interviews with skin mags!!!

"I get all those screenplays that start, 'Tawnya is in the shower. The water streams down her naked, perky breasts.' Somehow I don't think this is happening to Natalie Portman," said Alba, referring to the star of the wildly successful Star Wars prequels— widely known in the industry as 'Ugly McSaggyboobs'.

Alba finished the interview with a pout and an angry flap of her arms, saying: "Waa-waa-waa, poor me, I'm so hot."

2 Comments:

At 15/11/05 08:37, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Somehow I don't think this is happening to Natalie Portman," said Alba, referring to the star of the wildly successful Star Wars prequels— widely known in the industry as 'Ugly McSaggyboobs'."

Natalie Portman is Irish?

 
At 15/11/05 08:40, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OK, I just checked and Natalie Portman speaks Hebrew. Now, I'm not saying that no Irish person can speak Hebrew, but... No Irish person can speak Hebrew.

 

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